Brain Mayhem

2008-10-07T07:25:00.000-07:00

As much as I love John Lennon, he was wrong. Still it is an amazing song

2007-10-22T19:21:00.000-07:00

We're one week away from Halloween and it is 79 degrees... life's weird right now.

Tyler Durden: It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything.

But it is so damn hard to lose something even when you know that you don't need it or that is not good for you.

2007-05-25T11:39:00.000-07:00

The last month has been insane. I’m going back to therapy and things are getting a little better, I still have problems sleeping, but I know that eventually it will get better.

It seems like the SO is leaving, and the countdown started, within a couple of months there has to be a final answer of what is going to happen between us. I’m on this turning point of my life, things at work are good and it could be better, depending how hard I push, at this point I can decide what my future will be and I’m not sure if I know what I want. I want to be able to sleep in peace, I want to feel passionate about something else besides work and I want to feel like I’m making somebody happy.

I’ll write about the Viacom situation soon, I just wanted to have a post in order to come back with some explanation.

I’m still reading a lot of blogs, commenting as much as my limited time allows me, I definitely have to learn from a lot of people out there how to be a good blogger!

A lot has happened since that last post, including me having a 2 day affair with a person from my past that I haven’t seen in at least 9 years and that we were never involved in any kind of sexual way in the past. I still don’t know how it happened, but it did, and it was awesome and it was horrible because it remind me of what has been dying with the SO, passion!

Therapy is the last hope, I decided I cannot keep on changing my life around to make other people happy without getting anything back in return. It is time for me to be happy, it is time to enjoy life!

Plus it is 90 degrees and it’s the beginning of Fleet week in NYC….oh and I’m officially 31!

2007-03-14T06:23:00.000-07:00

I'm very curious about this. As you should know, Viacom sued YouTube for a Billion dollars. Here's the story:

Viacom sues 'GooTube' for $1 billion
NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- Viacom
sued Google and its online video subsidiary YouTube for $1 billion Tuesday,
the
first big lawsuit against the online video site and its parent for
copyright
infringement.
Experts predict more lawsuits to come.
YouTube
co-founders
Steven Chen and Chad Hurley have to deal with their first major
lawsuit for
copyright infringement. Viacom is suing YouTube and its parent
company Google
for more than $1 billion.
Google CEO Eric Schmidt defended
his firm's
purchase of YouTube and said it was eager to partner with media
firms at two
investment conferences earlier this month.

In the
lawsuit filed Tuesday
in the U.S. District Court for the Southern District
of New York, Viacom (Charts), owner
of MTV and Comedy Central, said that "almost 160,000 unauthorized clips of
Viacom's programming have been available on YouTube and that these clips had
been viewed more than 1.5 billion times."
In addition to damages, Viacom
said it wants an injunction prohibiting Google and YouTube from further
copyright infringement.
Google said that it and YouTube had yet to see
the
lawsuit but added they feel "confident that YouTube has respected the
legal
rights of copyright holders and believe the courts will agree."
Viacom first
demanded that YouTube take down videos from shows on
Viacom-owned networks that
were posted on the site without Viacom's consent. Google (Charts) bought
YouTube for nearly $1.7 billion last year.

There is a poll on cnn.com about this, here are the results:

How do you feel about Viacom's $1 billion lawsuit against YouTube?
Media companies need to protect their rights 17%
YouTube and media companies should negotiate a deal 29%
YouTube shouldn't be liable at all 49%
Not sure 5%
total responses to this question: 10641

I need your help, how do you feel about this? I think I have a strong position about this, but I would like to see how people feel about this. I'll have another post in a couple of days.

2007-03-13T08:13:00.000-07:00

I guess I'm falling back to my old habits where the posts are not happening as much. I've been having a crazy couple of weeks at work which I hope will be over soon. What's going on in my life:
* Finally is getting warmer here! I'm done with the frigid temperatures, really. Isn't it sad that I get very excited when I hear that today it will be 55!

* Sugar free gum sucks! I got this fancy type of gum that hold the berry flavor for 2.5 seconds. It was 5 f'ing dollars! I've been giving them to whoever comes to my office and the sad news is that everybody hates them. Screw you Dylan's Candy Bar!!!

* I went out on Saturday night. It's been a while since I went clubbing and I have to say, it is not as fun as it used to be. Thank god the company was good! Because of the Daylight Saving Time I got home around 4:30 and kind of drunk-texted somebody.... a very asshole thing to do, specially since I woke her up.... Apparently she didn't mind much at the end, it has to be my sexy accent! haha

* I spent $400 on an Xbox360. I'm not much of a gamer, but I find it a good way to release stress. Anyway, this thing is way more than a game console, you can hook it up to your PC, play with other people, download movies, play movies, music and pictures from your PC on your TV, really cool stuff. Obviously playing online doesn't do much for my ego, since a 10 year old can easily kick my ass on anything.

* Yesterday I got on the elevator when this girl came in with some flowers. Clearly she just came from the mail room and she had this huge smile on her face. As she looked at me she couldn't stop smiling. I told her that this was the part that we missed whenever we send flowers. We know (or at least hope) that the flowers will make you happy, however we usually are not there to see that face, so it was nice to see what a "I just got flowers" face looks like.

* I bought one of those thingies that clean your shower by pushing a button. I just started today, so I'm not sure how good this thing will be, I have to say I was hoping for something more "exciting", it just goes around once for about 20 seconds... that's it! I guess as long as it cleans I shouldn't care about the operational part, but I was hoping for something more.. damn expectations!

2007-03-07T06:12:00.000-08:00

I heard this on the news this morning, and I just couldn't believe it:

http://www.thejournalnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070307/NEWS02/703070378/1018

I understand the Principal's decision regarding the insubordination, everything else couldn't be more wrong. Why the hell did they censor the word vagina? Randomly they could censor the word nose or arm! What is so scary about that word? Why cannot a child hear about it?

Are we that afraid of everything related to sex? When are we going to realize that sex cannot and should not be demonized?

2007-02-26T07:35:00.000-08:00

Good morning, happy Monday!

2007-02-21T09:30:00.000-08:00

Life’s not bad… today is a beautiful day, yes 40 is still cold, but it is sunny and for some reason I feel good.

Here’s a poem that I just love:

Tactic and Strategy

My tactic is
to look at you
to learn how you are
to love you as you are

my tactic is
to talk to you
and to listen to you
to build with words
an indestructible bridge

my tactic is
to remain in your memories
I don't know how
nor with what pretext
but to remain with you

my tactic isto be frank
and to know that you're frank
and not to sell to ourselves
simulations
so that between us
there is no curtain
nor abyss

my strategy is
in contrast deeper and
more simple
my strategy is
that one of these days
I don't know how
nor with what pretext
you finally need me.

Apparently my tactics failed… I know I could keep on pursue them, but I don’t want to/cannot hurt her. As much as it sucks, I will move back to the “friends” line, a line that my head knew that we shouldn’t cross but when we did it just felt right. I had fun, but at the end she could be hurt and I would NEVER do that. She deserves A LOT, and I know that she will get it. Not everyday you find somebody that can make you smile for no reason, or for all reasons.

Oh and this morning I got the greatest email, it seems like I will be able to see The Police after all. It won’t be at the Garden, but still it will be good (I have a feeling that this is a one time only thing, I find it hard to believe that the reunion will last longer than this tour, but I might be wrong). So THANK you SO SO SO much. My favorite Police song? “King of Pain”, kind of the soundtrack of my life, HA!

2007-02-15T14:07:00.000-08:00

I don't have much to say, it was a crazy day but it seems like things are getting back to normal, or as normal as they can be. I just had to write about this: At 8am it was 15 degrees, with the wind chill we are talking about -5. Guess what was in the middle of Times Square? A hot tube, and a little set up with beach chairs and palm trees. To complete the picture there were 3 girls in bikinis! Apparently they wanted to promote Florida as a destination for a vacation. Well, they couldn't choose a better day! The streets are a mess, covered with snow that now is either nasty mud or solid ice, the wind is awful and it doesn't seem to get better.

Florida doesn't sound bad at all! however (and this shows how much of a nice guy I am), all I could think was, how much money can they pay to those girls? Is there a price for pneumonia? And as much as I love to admire girls in bikini I was ready to offer them my coat!

2007-02-14T11:31:00.000-08:00

Happy valentine’s to all. I personally think is a BS holiday, but what the hell do I know. I think it is ridiculous that tomorrow I will be able to buy flowers at a normal price, chocolates 50% off and be able to find a table in a nice place where I won’t be pushed to leave so they can have another customer.

Enjoy your chocolate, have multi-orgasmic sex and don’t forget that you don’t need a special day to show the people around you that you love them.

And remember that:
There's nothing you can do that can't be done.
Nothing you can sing that can't be sung.
Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the gameIt's easy.
There's nothing you can make that can't be made.
No one you can save that can't be saved.
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be in timeIt's easy.
All you need is love, all you need is love,All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.
All you need is love, all you need is love,All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
There's nothing you can know that isn't known.Nothing you can see that isn't shown.
Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be.It's easy.
All you need is love, all you need is love,All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
All you need is love (all together now)All you need is love (everybody)All you need is love, love, love is all you need.

2007-02-13T13:33:00.000-08:00

Quick updates

I talked to my boss about the other job, apparently there are tons of people running around trying to find a way to keep me here, that feels nice. Of course, people are getting fired left and right as well, so who knows!

I fucking HATE rodents. I know is a totally un-manly thing to say, but I cannot stand mice or rats, and unfortunately we have tons of that here. I don't mind that much when I see the huge rats running around the subway tracks, since they are far down below and unless it is damn super-rat of some type there is no way those things can jump that high (or so I hope). Here’s more info about me, I am so impatient that I like to be the first one to leave the subway so nobody is in front of me going up the stairs (nothing like having to walk behind an old person in the subway!!!). Well one of the disadvantages of leaving the car first and run up the stairs first, is that sometimes a retard rat forgets to hide when it hears the train, so I might be going up when one of these repulsive beasts is running down the steps, yeah, fun! There is just something about them that I cannot stand!

I HATE, HATE ticketmaster. I wanted to see The Police at the Madison Square Garden, I know for a fact that it will be sold out in minutes and that a ticket will go for hundreds and hundreds of dollars. They have this presale going on just for Best Buy rewards customers, of course I’m not one and I cannot sign up for one, now it is too late. There’s another presale for members of “The Police Tour Fan club” (WTF???); guess what, it costs $100 to be a member!!!! So besides the tickets, taxes and the fucking fee for ticketmaster I would also have to pay $100!!!! Sting, I would love to see you, but corporate America is against me!!!!

Peace!

2007-02-09T07:29:00.000-08:00

What the hell did I do? A couple of posts ago I was talking about my job and money. I reached a point where I know I deserve more. As cocky as it might sound (and by now you should already know that I have a fucking huge ego) I deserve a better title and/or a better pay. I can live without the title, but the money is something that needs to happen. I haven't been looking for a new job, because of my line of work I have permanent communication with a lot of external companies, so I'm fortunate enough to know a lot of people. Because of the quality of my work I know people respect me as much as to send me job offers.

I honestly don't want to leave. I like it here, I've been with the company for 5 years and overall it is an awesome place to work. I've learn A LOT, I've been lucky enough to meet the best of the best in the WORLD from all aspects of this industry and I made tons of friends. All the stress, long hours and BS are totally worth it. However, I need to make a move to reach what I want. NYC is fucking expensive, it is CRAZY expensive and I'm not living as comfortable as I would like to. For the past 2 years I literally transformed piece by piece the area that I'm managing, and I think it is time for me to be recognized for that. I was searching monster.com or hotjobs.com and I found a company looking for somebody to do exactly what I've been doing. The title is better and I have no idea about the money. I updated my resume in 20 minutes and hit "send".

I didn't think about it until this morning. What if the pay is way more, what if they offer me what I want? I know I'm perfect for that job, I know there is nobody out there that can do it better than me. And as much as I don't want to leave it would be retarded for me to turn it down. Crap!

I'm so drinking tonight! anybody wants to join in?

2007-02-07T14:10:00.000-08:00

I'm back!

The last 2 days, especially Monday were the worst ever. It took me 5 years to actually take a sick day. Hopefully I won't feel that bad in another 5 years.

Thanks for the emails and get well wishes. And for the naked pictures, that really made my day (kidding!!!!).

I'm starting to think that I should make this blog prettier, since the writing is so shitty at least it could be something pretty to look at. If people with really amazing designs are thinking of changing them, what are the hopes for something as blah as mine?

I might surprise you with the super cool, new sexy version of the same crappy blog.

2007-02-05T06:53:00.000-08:00

I had a very bittersweet weekend. The bad part? I've been sick! I lost my voice, my head was hurting like hell, and now my stomach is joining the fun! (I know, very sexy!). Today is cold as fuck and after throwing up this morning I decided to come to work anyway since I have a couple of meetings. BAD IDEA! I felt a little better after the "return" but while I was in the subway everything came back. Thanks to the freezing cold outside I forgot all about the stomach until I came into my office. Now I'm kind of stuck, because I might as well stay for the meetings, but I can feel that at any minute I might be running down the whole.

While I wasn't particularly excited about the Superbowl, I still wanted to watch it. Well, to cure the headache I took some sinus medicine that knock me down cold, so I missed almost the entire game (I only woke up for the last 4 minutes!).

The sweet part? That might be a secret (no, I didn't get laid) sometimes a special connection can be as nice.

If you excuse me I'll go lay down under my desk for the rest of the day.

2007-02-02T07:58:00.000-08:00

The Number

In the past week I've been reading a few blogs about number of partners. I think everybody agrees that this can be a very sensitive subject to bring up with your partner. Here's my little story. The SO was very, VERY inexperienced when I met her. She only dated a couple of guys in high school and she never did anything sexual with them. In fact, she was a virgin until well pass her 25th birthday. The way she lost it? she met a guy on the Internet, after holding on to her virginity for so long waiting to get married, she decided to just have the experience. She met the guy and did it twice, and that was it.

Years later I showed up and well, I had her in bed on the second date. I might be a lot of things (including not been the most best looking guy), but I know how to treat a woman. I took her on the nicest date of her life so the sex part was a given. I have to say that it wasn't the best, but there was potential there. The second or third time we had sex, she said that she loved me, yeah that kind of freaked me out. Apparently she never had an orgasm before, so I show her the good way!

Obviously I show her positions, techniques, toys, a whole world that was completely new to her. A lot of times she asked how did I knew all that, and of course we reached the "how many women have you slept with?" conversation. I knew that was trouble. I never answered that, even after she told me everything about her. I knew it was going to hurt her, I knew she didn't really wanted to know.

One day, while we were visiting my family we were drinking (yup we do that a lot back home) and she keep on asking and asking. She was also drinking (she is a light drinker), so i left my guard down and gave her a number. So here's the deal, I don't think there's a right or a wrong number as long as the sex you had made you happy and it was what you were looking for. If you only had one sex partner and that was enough for you, good for you! If you had 70 partners and you enjoyed all or at least most of them, enjoy it! I had sex with almost 30 women in my life. And proudly I can say that I could call all of them today and have a decent conversation. Yes, there were some one night stands, some fuck buddies and a lot of failed relationships. There were younger women and older women (18 years was the biggest difference). I'm sure this is a very low number for some people, and very high for others... well, I couldn't care less, I didn't had sex with these women to tell anybody or to make me feel more of a man (I have to agree when people talk about the bloggers that clearly lie about their sexual experience, but hey whatever makes you happy!).

I didn't tell the SO, the real number, I told her half of the real number. In a matter of seconds tears started to come down her face. The mix of the new information with the alcohol didn't help, so the tears didn't stop and my family was really worried about her. My sister got pissed at me and asked me what did I do to her... yeah, that is something you want to explain to your younger sister!

Why did she wanted to know? what was the point? I only had unprotected sex with the ex, and that was after getting tested together, any other time I always used protection, even when I was totally wasted. I want to keep on having sex for a long time, and the last thing I want is to get sick. I lost my virginity when I was almost 15, that gives me an average of almost 2 women per year of sexual activity. Of those 15 years, I was with the ex for 4 and with the SO for 5, so the large number of encounters happened between those 2 relationships. For what I've heard I'm not that close to be a man whore, but I might be wrong.

The number for me, means nothing! So feel free to share your number! (hey I can be curious!)

PS... can somebody send me some Nyquil? I've been drinking that every night and I don't feel any better! but I can sleep like a baby!

2007-01-31T06:03:00.000-08:00

I had another post in mind, however I had to change it after what I saw this morning. As some of you know, Times Square can be a very interesting place, you never know what you can find. Since there's so many people walking around (natives and tons of tourists) marketing people have a lot of crazy, innovative promotions. It also helps that the ABC and MTV studios are right here. Well, a lot of times I saw stuff that always made me think "damn, I wish I had my camera to get a picture of this". Well, I've been doing this, capturing people in crazy costumes, celebrities or just weird stuff.

This morning while walking from the subway station to work (about 2 blocks) I saw a big American flag hanging from a car. The closer I got, I started to see some signs and a few pictures. The first picture I saw was showing a close up of two soldiers hugging each other, smiling. I got to the corner, and the light was red, so I got more time to really check the truck (a brown station wagon). The second picture was showing the body of one of those American soldiers from the first picture. He was wearing his uniform and the coffin was covered by the American flag. It was then when I finally was able to check the whole truck. The back door was open and inside there was a coffin covered with the flag. On the right side you could see the boots and his tags around them. Hanging on something next to the truck was his uniform.

I don't know what the intention was with the display. I honestly don't know what else to write, besides that maybe there should be one truck in Times Square for each one of the more than 3000 soldiers killed in Iraq. Maybe, just maybe it is time to rethink the plan (was there a plan to begin with?).

We'll be back with regular programming later on.

2007-01-29T08:35:00.000-08:00

Sometimes have you had one of those nights when you are a few hours of going to bed and it seems like the day is gone? Like nothing else will happen during that day? When the only surprise that can appear in your life is a funny new commercial or a good movie that you didn't expect to see?

Well last night it was one of those nights, until almost 8pm. After that, I was gladly surprised for 4.5 hours. Here's some inside info. I have problems falling sleep, but I do try to go to bed around 11 or 11:30 if I have to work in the morning, otherwise I know I can regret it the next morning. Last night I went to bed around 1am, still woke up before 6.

I LOVE to be surprised! little things like that can make your whole week. So it is fucking freezing outside, but my smile this morning could melt whatever snow fell over night.

2007-01-26T08:11:00.000-08:00

What happened this morning?

Did I:

a.- Hit this

with this?

(that is my head with the border of an open drawer)

b.- Hit this:

with this:

(good 'ol little toe with the border of a desk/table/corner of the wall/border of the shower or tub)

c.- Hit this:

with this:

(A little elbow vs border of the desk or chair action)

Sadly the answer is "B". So since a 9 degree weather (or minus 10 if you add the wind) wasn't bad enough, now every step I take hurts.

Way to start the weekend!

2007-01-25T13:45:00.000-08:00

While talking about the work life, my brother used to say that things get easier the higher that you get. Ironically he has never been able to hold a steady job in his entire life, so all I can think is that he pulled that idea from his ass. Don't get me wrong, I think my brother is one of the smartest guys I know, he is extremely creative and a true artist. As so, he has a huge problem with authority, and that's the reason why cannot keep a job for more than a few months.

Then there's me. I know how to play the game, and I was able to climb the corporate ladder pretty fast. I'm not that high (it is difficult to do so in such a huge company) but I'm getting there. After thew few years that I've been "kind" of up there I can truly say that thing's don't get easier.

I'm in the middle of a "negotiation" with my salary. for the past year and a half I've been changing the way the company does the business that I'm handling. Things have improved, money have been saved, clients are happy. I know i deserve to move to the next level, money and title wise. I am the best at whatever I do (my dad always told me that I Can be a clown if I wanted to, but I had to be the BEST clown); when I was waiting tables while going to school I was the best waiter, I fucking hated that job but I was the best at it! the money was awesome and I got to met tons of women.

Now I have to bargain for more money and a better title, which sucks, but I seriously doubt that it would happen if I don't push for it. A very good friend of mine (he is a top guy, but not above me, yeah I know this sounded gay) told me to play the "I got a job offer" card. I did get a job offer, but I didn't really pursue it because the money was about the same I'm making here and I would have to move to California. I know that with my knowledge and experience I could get another job, but I like the one I have.

I guess sometimes you have to ask and fight for what you want, apparently I've been spoiled since I never had to beg for raises or promotions. The next step is to talk to my boss and see what happens. I know they cannot afford to lose me, but I don't want to reach the extreme of giving them an ultimatum. There's a popular phrase in Spanish" el que no llora, no mama", which means that if you don't cry you will not suck (referring to a kid crying t be breastfed).

I guess I have to start crying!

ps... the girl from the Christmas party invite me to lunch today. She's a vegetarian, it would never work!

ps2. I need to start making a list of the blogs I read! there are so many so good! I try to comment on most, but trust me, I read them constantly.

2007-01-19T14:29:00.000-08:00

I'm so glad it is Friday!

I'll be watching football and drinking beer, because I deserve it! I also deserve to receive dirt text messages, but apparently that is not going to happen this weekend (enjoy your margaritas tonight anyway!).

I just received an IM from an old, OLD friend. He used to live across my house since I was 12 or so. We were very close, then puberty hit and somehow he became a better friend of my brother, go figure. Still, he just asked me about the ex. I haven't think about her since "The Office" story, and before I wrote that story I didn't think about her for the longest time. I think I'm going to give her a call, she is a wonderful woman, just not the right one for me. Maybe I should send her a dirty text message! (joking!!!). He also told me that this girl that we used to know from the early years said hi, that was odd...that girl hasn't been on my mind for more than 15 years!! one of these days I have to write her story, it is related to spin the bottle, yeah it was a long time ago!!!!

Anybody up for a friendly game of spin the bottle?

2007-01-18T10:07:00.000-08:00

* 4 tequila based drinks + 3 Vodka Martinis and 1 Corona = $78

* Delicious and incredible cheap Chinese food for two = $5.50 (yes you read it right, and it was damn GOOOOOOD)

* Spending the night with an amazing, totally cool and hot woman listening to erotic stories, meeting and have a conversation with a professional dominatrix from Texas and a lawyer from DC all in the same place and night = Priceless!!!

This kind of stuff only happens in New York. Awesome night with great company, good drinks and delicious food! oh right, and the dominatrix (a totally hot blond woman) asked me if I would like to cross dress, ha!

2007-01-16T07:50:00.000-08:00

I am going to answer the comments on this post. Chris is right about the man part, however I think that more women are feeling the same way, still we cannot deny that the double standard is very much alive: if a man sleeps around and has tons of women then he is a stud, if a woman does the same she is a slut. As a male, somehow I have the "expectation" of sleep around, as a half Hispanic male my odds of cheating (stereotype-wise) are humongous!

Those "expectations" make me insane! But are real. We grew up on a society that can ties together love and sex, and it disapproves any kind of independence between them. Last week, while reading the Village Voice (for all of you non New Yorkers it is a free newspaper that used to be political but now is dramatically changing for the worse) I found one of my favorite columnists. His name is Dan Savage and he writes a sex advice column that has no boundaries. All topics are open and his answers are always real, even if it is not what we want to read. Anyway, this week's letters were focused on "cuckolds" (if you don't know what it, you might not want to know!). Here's the piece that caught my attention:

"For some folks, sex is about love and pleasure and possession—and there's
nothing necessarily unhealthy about the desire to possess someone. We should all
understand, of course, that we can never truly possess another person, but we shouldn't feel guilty when our hearts or genitals feel a bit differently. Human beings should be rational ("I know I don't own you") about the irrational feelings love inspires ("I own your ass!").

I don't want to hurt the SO, and I know that's what I would do if I bring up the whole "open relationship" issue. Besides, I don't want an open relationship, clearly I have a relationship. All the time I hear and read about domestic violence, scum bags that don't work or guys that don't have any respect for their partners. Maybe those guys don't sleep with anybody else, but is it worth it? It might sound as if I'm trying to justify myself, but I don't think I have to, I should be apologetic, but I'm not. I know the discussion is out of the question, I know I make her happy and I know I don't want to hurt her. Again, I had the opportunities to fuck around very often, but I didn't (even if I don't look like a model I can turn on the charm pretty easily :) ). It is so difficult to explain! Sometimes people want honestly as long as it is what they want to hear, I did the honesty thing once, the answer from that person? "Why did you tell me? i didn't want to know!". Going back to the initial point (I think I had a point somewhere!) : Males are simple creatures, pretty dumb ones by the way, so go easy on us... we might get better, eventually.

Somehow sex became this overcomplicated thing!

When there's a penis inside a vagina the heart doesn't need to be invited...but if it is, you might enjoy it more.

Cheers!

PS... the temperature dropped from 55 degrees to 30 between midnight and noon! I cannot wait for spring!!! I want to see women wearing skirts and sandals, it it too much to ask?

2007-01-12T12:47:00.000-08:00

The S.O.

It's almost been a month since I started to write this post! So there is a Significant Other. I know I might get a lot of hate mail or lose readers (I still cannot believe that people read this!) but I want to explain the whole situation.

We've been together for around 5 years now and in general I don't have major complaints. Our issues be reduced to her hate for NYC and her hate for her job. Clearly i love this city, it might not be the easiest place to live, but I like it and I don't plan to leave it, on the other hand she wants to leave badly (she is originally from a relatively small city in the south). We met in NY and I never promise her to move back, I never lie about that, but it seems like she was hoping that I was going to change my mind, sorry it is not going to happen.

Besides that, in general we are a good couple. I might sound cocky, but I think I'm a great partner. I'm the kind of guy that brings her flowers for no reason whatsoever (and it is something that happens often). I'm that guy that wakes up almost 2 hours earlier than he is supposed to just so he can drive her to work, and then takes the subway so she can keep the car and drive back (no need for her to take the subway). Money wise, I take care of all expenses, she just has to work to pay her student loans and huge credit card debt. I'm also the kind of guy that cooks her dinner almost every night and does laundry (and pays for dry cleaners).

I am also the kind of guy that gives her orgasms whenever we have sex, and totally understands when she is not in the mood. Does it sound too perfect? I know! Sometimes when she gets pissed she calls me that, Mr Perfect... but I am not, I am just the result of my parents, if I learned something from them was that. They love each other to dead, but my dad was rarely involved on that "other side" of life, he was just the person that worked, brought the money, period. Whenever my mom had to e in the hospital for a couple of weeks, my dad was totally useless (living of take out food). The deal they had was clear, my mom didn't had to work but she was going to take of everything else. Apparently it was a fair deal, but my mom always pushed us to be independent (as in not depend on somebody to take care of us). My point is that I do what I do because I want to, and it is not a sacrifice.

So after all that, I do have what seems to be a problem. I don't have a problem having sex with other people. Let me clarify this, I don't fuck everything that moves, and I don;t do it all the time. It might had happen twice since I've been with the SO, even though I had more chances than that. here's the deal, for me it was just sex, i love the SO and in no moment the thought of leaving her crossed my mind. This might sound awful, but I was just satisfying a need, if you are hungry, you eat, if you are horny, you fuck. The 2 people I did it with were in the same boat, there were no feelings involved besides a friendship.

So even though i had the chance to score twice (that girl from the previous story has been texting me a lot) I didn't do it. Probably the question that a lot of people are going to ask is: what if she did the same to you? The honest answer is that I would understand, i would be shocked, but if she assures me that it was just sex I would be fine. A don't ask don't tell policy would be the same. We were raised with an overcomplicated idea of sex. Yeah it is better if you have sex with somebody that you love, but you cannot deny the power of a good old fuck fueled just by passion and desire.

Am i THAT weird? Am I too much of an asshole?

2006-12-20T08:57:00.000-08:00

I'm back, kind of! I had the craziest end of year, then took a week off, and this new year has been packed with issues at work. I'll be back soon, hopefully later today!

2006-12-14T06:17:00.000-08:00

The Wingman

So this week one of my best friends came to visit. Every time that we get together something has to happen. Just to make a quick account of the last 2 visits:
* Visited one of the nastiest strip clubs I've ever been! We used to go there with friends from college and it was really good. The last visit was scary as hell, the dancers were horrible and the other customers were scary looking, we payed $40 just to get in and we left in less than 5 minutes. Since I had to find something to delete the images that were stuck on my brain after that horrible place we decide to go to Scores. That's a no-brainer, you cannot go wrong there, gorgeous girls and great drinks, of course all of that has a high price. In less than 3 hours he was able to spend more than $500.
* After a night of party we end up on a high class whore house. The girls were unbelievable! really, perfect model like bodies. By the time we got there I was totally wasted, however not wasted enough to actually take the offer and pick a girl. Call me whatever you want, but I just cannot imagine the idea of paying for sex, even if it is with the most perfect girl ever. So while he was doing his thing with a damn expensive hooker, i was chatting and drinking with a group of them who was using all kind of tactics to take me in.

So, when he arrived in NYC last Friday I was a little worried. Because we both were so busy at work we didn't get a chance to see each other, that is until I got an IM that said "I need you on Wednesday". Here's a litte something about him: he's loaded but he has no game whatsoever! Not that he is bad looking, far from it, but he just doesn't have that IT factor with girls. Here's what happened, in one of his nightly runs he met this girl at a restaurant, she is the hostess of that place, and her birthday was on Wednesday. So he offer to take her out for her birthday, however, and I don't blame her she said that she had a friend that would like to go out with them; and here's were the hero of this story gets involved. My friend beg me to go out with them so he could hook up with the hostess. I used to be a kick ass wingman, I was the guy that would take the ugly girl away just so my friend had a chance with the hot one. But that was a long time ago.

I'm sure the Significant Other wouldn't appreciate if somebody told them that they saw me having dinner with a girl, I'm good when I play outside, so going out with 2 girls that I have never met was kind of risky. But hey, it is me and I wanted to spend some time with my friend anyway. So off we go, I said yes to a blind date that wasn't really a date. Since I was working and had the day from hell, I told them to pick me up at work and then we would go from here. They showed up around 7:30 and I was still working, so i brought them up to a conference room while I finished. Well, the girl that my friend liked was ok, beautiful body but her face wasn't that much, now her friend was beautiful, same great body, but her face was so much better! Which was good and bad, bad because I knew I could be interested.

From my building we walked to this fancy restaurant around Central Park (you cannot really say no to a walk in the city in the middle of December when it is this warm!). On the way there we passed Rockefeller Center which surprisingly wasn't that packed. The girls got their cameras and started to take pictures, I was clever enough to take the pictures but don't appear on them, the last thing I wanted was any evidence of that night! As I was seeing that there was nothing going on between my friend and his girl I told him to buy her one of those Santa hats, just for the fun of it, and it could be a cute thing. He wasn't sure, but i pushed him, and guess what? she loved it!

When we got to the restaurant I wasn't that happy. It was way too fancy! Don't get me wrong, fancy places are ok, but I wasn't in the mood for it. There's something about $70 small piece of meat that is just not right. However, i knew that was my friends game, awe them with a fancy place, which might work, but it cannot close the deal. After spending a ridiculous amount of money on some delicious but tiny meal accompanied by champagne we finished with some ok desserts. All dinner I was trying to get some conversation going, asking questions and making a fool of myself, but in a good way, not in a frat boy kind of way. They laugh all the time, and seemed more comfortable. When we were done with dinner we decided to go for drinks. There things got a little crazier since some tequila shots were involved. My friend once again didn't do much so I tried to keep on pushing the focus to him, working on him been the fun guy, but he just doesn't have it, period.

By the end of the night I had both girls on my lap (I was wearing Santa's hat), got close to kiss the hot one and was invited to go out the next Friday. Now my friend left the city and I have the chance to call this girl. hmm what to do? Honestly it is just fucking awesome to know that I still have it! Even though I would HATE do date again... all of you daters out there keep having a blast, just let me know if you need a wingman!

2006-12-12T06:10:00.000-08:00

Dear Santa,

Please fix me a drink, NOW!. Yeah I know it is just 9am, but trust me with the couple of days I've been having I deserve a drink...I would also like a massage...and a long vacation somewhere warm where the drinks are served on coconuts and have little gay pink umbrellas...and some sex... and a free afternoon so i can finally decided what new car should I get... and that my boss will finally meet with me for more than the usual 3 minutes per week that we have, but just for this week.... and for the rest of winter to stay like this week (56 degrees people!!!).... and for the stock of my company to go up, A LOT... and for U2 to stop releasing greatest hits albums every damn year (seriously!)... and for my special friend to visit me at work this week (I NEED to see you!)... and for Banana Republic to reduce the price of that jacket that I fucking love but I cannot let myself sepnd $1600 on a piece of clothing

oh yeah and overflow my email with raunchy pictures of beautiful girls... and of course world peace!

What do YOU want for Christmas?

2006-12-08T07:09:00.000-08:00

You will be disappointed, period.. but before we get to the details of the party, what the FUCK is going on with the weather? I'm sure some people or going to think I'm a whiny brat, but it was 19 degrees this morning, and my friends that is damn cold, specially since were been spoiled with 50 degree days for the past weeks! the worst part? it is also windy, so subtract a few degrees to those 19!

Now, about the parta-y! The day of the party I had the worst day ever, that rant a couple of posts earlier? multiply that by 10 and that would get close to the kind of day I was having... I didn't left work until after 8pm, so i was already tired as hell. We have a tradition with some good friends to have dinner before the Xmas party, of course I wasn't able to make it because I was stuck at work (you gotta love when you have to deal with people in California! those 3 hours difference basically means that i will continue to receive emails and calls up to 9pm). Anyhow, I finally made it to the party, and guess who is one of the first familiar faces I see? Girl #1 (the one I made out with last year)... nice as always, we hugged and she gave me a kiss on the cheek, and that is it! I didn't see her again for the rest of the night. Just to clarify, this party is damn huge! so there's a good chance that you are not going to find everybody you know, and if you start walking around probably you lost your group for the night (it is that big).

Again, the party was awesome, as always, got to see people that I haven't seen in a long time, people that I currently work that I like, and tons of hot girls (gotta love the entertainment industry!). After my 3rd drink, I was next to the bar fighting my way to get me another drink, when somebody hug me from behind. That was girl #2. I turned around and somebody got between us, so i just shook her hand, her response? "just a hand shake?". After the person between us moved, we hugged. We start talking (well, more like yelling because of the music), and somebody gave me a drink, basically I was pulled to another conversation because somebody wanted to introduce me to this big kahuna... then she was gone. I thought that was it for the night, the chances of seeing her again were very slim, so I was kind of relieved that there wasn't going to be any drama, and that I would make it home with no incidents.

Then, she showed up again. How? I have no idea! most of my friends were gone, so I was just making the last round to see if there was any other familiar faces around. By then I was already close to been drunk, so i wasn't really concerned about drama or anything. We sat down and start dancing (remember I have been working 12 hour days the whole week, so I was tired as hell). Then she started to get closer and do the whole slutty dance where she basically rubs everything on me... hmm alcohol took over and my hands started to move around her body, then I told her we had to go to the dance floor. We went down to the floor and did the same, but this time there was more contact. After a while of rubbing and touching the party was about to be over. No kissing! we got very close, a lot of teasing, our lips almost touching, but nothing. Then I just had to go home, i was so tired I was ready to pass out. i found out that she lived a block or so away from the place were the party was, so been the gentleman that I am, I offer to walk her home. Since it was damn cold already I even gave her my coat. While walking there it hit me, this is trouble. We got to her building door and I just hug her and took 2 steps down and told her that I had to go back. She went in, closed the door, and 30 seconds later, when I started to walk back, she opened the door again.

I just smiled, wave my hand and went back to the party, took a cab home and emailed her on my way home... she emailed me back this morning, I will be visiting her office later today.

I so needed to masturbate last night!

dscn3215

2006-12-08T07:07:00.001-08:00

dscn3215
Originally uploaded by el.cuervo76.

Do you remember those anti-drugs commercials "this is your brain, this is your brain on drugs'? Well this is the eye after a night of drinking and dancing after only 3 hours of sleep

2006-12-05T13:07:00.000-08:00

Ok, now I'm really screwed. I am SO going to drink at the party that is not going to be any funny. It can go two ways: Either I'll get in trouble with girl #1 or #2 or I will kill somebody. Without giving too much information, this is what I do: I'm basically the link between my company and outside companies regarding the product that I handle. The outside companies are vendors and clients. There's a shitload of people that work in my company to make sure that the product is good, but at the end the responsibility of delivering that product falls into one group. I don't have any control over that group whatsoever, I'm not even part of that group, but because of my job I need to deal with them.

Well, after all the work of literally dozens of people, this last group delivered a product with errors. Obviously the clients let us know about it. Well, since I don't have access to that group I did what I always do, send an internal email asking for an explanation (key word: "internal").

That group bypassed me and contacted the client directly, not giving an answer, but asking them what was the problem, since they couldn't find anything wrong on their end. For their misfortune, I already knew what was the issue, but because I was on the subway i couldn't email them about it (eventually they have to allow some kind of blackberry signal in the subway people!!!). So, now the client thinks that we don't know what we are doing because this group wasn't able to detect such an obvious issue!

So, all the work of all these people, including my team, went to hell because somebody was cutting some corners. Fuck them! I know I'm anal at work, but because of that things run smoothly and people are happy (internally and externally), and now because of this single group we are back in square one.

Sorry for the rant, but I'm so fucking ready to kill somebody!!!!! I need to start keeping a bottle of vodka or something in my desk!

We'll get back to some inappropriate, highly sexual topic tomorrow.

2006-12-04T11:12:00.000-08:00

Thank God is only once a year!

As I've said a million times I love my job. I found it entertaining, exciting and challenging. There's always something new or something old that needs to be fixed (or I'll fix it, even if it is working OK, because just OK is not good enough for me, there's always a better way!). The general mood of the company is very relaxed and it has great benefits. HOWEVER, like in the whole entertaining industry, the money situation is not ideal, at my level is not bad, but I could be making more somewhere else.

So, once a year, the company shows everybody how much we are appreciated by renting one of the coolest places in the city for a night of open bar, great DJ's, somehow good food and a lot of inappropriate behavior: The Christmas Party. On my first year I got so drunk that I only made it to work after 1pm the next day. I got better with time and I learned that I cannot have a drink with every single person that comes to me. When the alcohol is free, people feel the need to bring you drinks that you didn't request, which can end up with a nasty combination on your stomach: My typical vodka, plus a shot of tequila with X department, and a shot of scotch with Y area, etc. Once all that alcohol starts to kick in, then the inhibitions go away, you know what they say about Vegas? well, you can apply that to any Christmas party where there's an open bar.

There's this girl that I used to work with a long time ago. We always flirted but nothing happened, she new about my significant other. Every Christmas party we have a couple of shots. Two years ago we had our typical shot and then we kiss each other, a quick friendly kiss on the lips. End of the story. Moving forward to last year, same ritual, shot and a kiss... hmm last year I got a little more to drink than usual, so after the second shot I told her that we had to go dancing. The dancing floor was packed, so I took her to the middle, just melting with tons of other people, and we made out. You know one of those make out sessions that just drive you crazy? There was the attraction, the passion that we had for each other for so long but that we never followed, and the adrenaline rush because at any moment somebody that knew either one could've seen us.

I knew this was trouble, she knew this was trouble and we stopped on time. There was that moment when I knew I was going to end up on her bed if I stayed any longer. So after a few more drinks I left.

Then there's the hangover. I emailed her the next day, just asking her if she got home ok. No answer... a couple of weeks later I emailed her again, she responded, but it was very generic, nothing more than a quick hello and a "we should do lunch sometime" kind of thing. So I never push the subject and I haven't seen her since then.

Now, for the past month I've been receiving visits on my office from this girl. She has an office on this floor, but because of the location I rarely go that way. She's hot, killer rack and amazing ass. We joke and smile, and once when she visit me she moved behind my desk to check the view. I did nothing while she put her face on the window giving me an awesome view of that perfectly round ass. Here's the deal, she asked me if I was going to the party, and when I said yes, she said that we definitely need to have a drink, which is fine. But I know me, I know I cannot turn off my "flirt" mode and i know that alcohol can only facilitate things. The girl from last year doesn't work on my building, so that helped, but this girl works right on my floor. Besides girl #1, I only messed around with another employee was with an intern a few years ago (I have to tell that story one of these days). I honestly don't think it is a good idea to mess around with co-workers, but that party has all the elements to make me forget about that.

Maybe is nothing and this new girl just wants a drink, maybe girl #1 will break the shot annual ceremony, and maybe I will be home by 11pm totally sober.

or maybe not....

What I see every morning pt1

2006-11-29T11:58:00.001-08:00

DSCN3207
Originally uploaded by el.cuervo76.

This is what I see every morning. I took this yesterday when it was sunny, today is pretty crappy.

2006-11-28T09:44:00.000-08:00

All the Small Things

There are certain things in life that just put a smile on your face. It can be the most insignificant thing and somehow it makes your day. I can honestly say that I'm very easy to please, I don't need much to smile! This morning I got in the subway and it wasn't as full as always, in fact there was one empty sit. I rarely sit in the subway (I don't get much exercise lately, so at least I try to not sit down as much as I can), so I only stood in front of the empty sit since there was no other place to stand. Anyway, as soon as I got there I turned around and this 30 something redhead woman gave me "the gesture", not the sexual one, but the one where she acts all cute so I can let her sit down. By the way, I'm all for giving women, kids and elderly people my sit on the rare occasions when I actually decide to sit down.

Anyway, after the look, I moved back in order for her to get thru, unfortunately there was a black guy behind me so I step on his foot, yikes! Because I I was carrying my laptop on the backpack I couldn't really move much without losing my balance. I said sorry to the guy, but I couldn't really see his face because the woman was trying to get in front of me. And then it happened. She was about to sit down using the little space between me and the sit, so her face was right in front of my face, I tried to give her as much space as possible but there was no way to avoid the contact. I looked down just to make sure that she had room (she was about half a foot shorter) and there it was, a black lace kind of see thru bra. For all you girls reading: we cannot stop looking at a bra, it has to be something genetic, we just have to watch. The moment lasted less than a few seconds, and I didn't really saw much, just the top of her white breast in perfect contrast with her black bra. She sat down and I had a smile on my face. She looked up and smile back. Then I turned around and gave my proper apologies to the black dude.

Silly story, with no reason whatsoever, but that simple thing made my morning... see? I'm easy to please! I just need a see thru piece of clothing and I'm good for the day!

2006-11-27T11:51:00.000-08:00

Isn't it fun to go back to work after a 4 day break? I guess is not so bad, the weather has been pretty great the last couple of days, which kind of scares me because it is not supposed to be this warm. One side of me is really enjoying this, while the other side is worried that in a few weeks it will be 10 degrees with 4 feet of snow.

I'm really disappointed because my camera decided to die on me last Wednesday, so I have no prove that I saw Mr Blaine! I finally left work around 2pm, so before I ran out I checked online to see where the hell was he (I couldn't see anything from my window). Believe it or not I almost gave up, because I almost couldn't find the exact location, until it appeared: 46th between 7th and 8th. I start walking, and yeah it took me forever because there was a gazillion people outside. I stopped in Broadway and 46th and look up, nothing. hmm weird. I walked one more block and nothing, two more and nothing. I decided to walk from Broadway to 8th avenue and just take the subway home. i was right in the middle of 2 stations, so I decided to walk back and use my usual stop. While walking on 8th and 46th, I saw him. They didn't close the street or anything. Basically they took a parking lot and put a stand. The guy wasn't 5 stories high, maybe 3, if. The machine wasn't controlling the movements, he was controlling it, so he could stop and then turn however he wanted. After 2.5 minutes I was done. I mean, cool, and good for him, but it wasn't that exciting, in fact there wasn't a lot of people checking him out. He posed for pictures, and then went back to spin around. I took my camera out and the bitch just died. Sorry Mr Blaine, maybe next year.

The rest of the weekend, was uneventful. I slept as much as I could, eat way too much and finished some work. No sex today kids!

PS, a certain someone wants to stop by my office on Friday, that spells T-R-O-U-B-L-E. I'm still thinking about accepting that plan or just avoid drama.

2006-11-22T09:31:00.000-08:00

This city is awesome, no questions about it. Great food, the best museums, stores, etc. But there's always something that makes this city a shitty place to live: tourists. I know, I was one also, however some of the people visiting seem to forget that this is also a place were people actually work! I'm specifically talking about Times Square. This area has changed on an amazing way in the last decades. The first time I came to New York, TS was a hell whole. I think Taxi Driver is the perfect picture of that time: tons of sex shops, stripping joints and hookers. The Giuliani came on board and now TS is just another Disney! I work right on TS, and I mean right in the middle, I can see the New Year's ball dropping from my office's window.

The location is perfect for me, the subway is a couple of blocks away and it takes me almost no time to get home. The problem appears when I leave the station. A journey that should only take a couple of minutes can be as long as 5 or 10! how? Well, some tourists (I'm not blaming everybody) decide that the middle of the sidewalk is the perfect place to take a picture or to shop for the perfect tour on a double decker bus. But that's not all, oh no, if it is a big group they all feel the need stop at the same time so NOBODY can go thru!

Again, I was a tourist once, and I took pictures and the whole thing, but I tried to cause as little congestion as possible, some people are trying to get to work!

Please come to NY, enjoy the city, spend a lot of money so my taxes don't go up, but for the love of god, do not block the sidewalk! Now I'm on my way to see David Blaine and take pictures :)

2006-11-21T12:08:00.000-08:00

I just saw the video of Kramer using the N word. The way I see it, that word will lose its shocking calue within the next 2 generations. I'm not sure if this happens everywhere, but at least in NY you hear it all the time specially on teenagers. The funny thing is that it is not just used among african-american teenagers but white and hispanic kids are using it alike. I know that the word itself has the most despicable origins, and it has always been used to denigrate a group of people, however because of pop culture (yeah, basically rap music) the word is loosing the power. Don't get me wrong, I still hate the word because of the connotation, however at the end it is just that, it is just a word that a group of black entertainers used so much that now is part of the popular culture.

If you watched Comic Relief last Saturday, you were exposed to the N word a good 100 times if not more, mostly (if not exclusively) by black comedians. The bits were funny, serious comments or critcism to races and America in general. I guess the use of the N word is ok, because they don't mean any harm, but I feel like it is harming people. It is giving an OK for anybody that wants to use that word. Should it be forbidden? Probably not, but don't make a huge deal because somebody famous (that is not black) used it.

I'm part of a minority, and the way I see it there's only one way to get out of the stereotypes: break them! work hard, prove "the man" wrong! You are the one that has the power to break the mold! it is possible!

Damn, now I'm doctor-phil-ing on the blog... i need a break!

2006-11-20T10:49:00.000-08:00

The Visit

I've been working on this story for the longest time, and well, Bri's dilemma with her boy (oh man we guys really suck!) push me to finish it once and for all.

I'm not sure if many people out there have the Office-sex fantasy. For me it wasn't on the top 3 until The Ex showed me the light. I dated The Ex for 4 years, 3 in a row and on and off the last year we were together. She was the one that calmed me down, the one that showed me a more sophisticated and mature way of life. we still partied, but in a more mature way. And the sex was just insane! We had no boundaries, and we tried almost every fantasy that we had at the time.

She is a great girl, but we were not that great as a couple. She is the most social person I have ever met, totally lovable and she could start a conversation with anybody anywhere. Because of this, she was the first one to get a job offer right after college, an entry level PR/HR job for a great cellphone company. Basically she was in charge of a floor that had tons of conference/training rooms on the corporate building (somewhere in the 10th or 12th floor). Right out of college we were crazy about work, working insane hours and enjoying it to the max, but of course we couldn't see each other as often as we used to. Because of this, every time that we met the passion was unbelievable! and we couldn't keep the hands off each other.

One night i went to pick her up since we were going to have dinner. I took a cab from my office and headed to hers (she also had a car, so we usually drove hers so she could go home easily, that car has some stories as well! one day I'll write about it). When I got to her floor, it was totally empty, it had to be around 9pm or something like that so the only security personnel at that time was in the lobby (usually when I went to visit her a security guard was around).

She was still doing the inventory for some equipment on one of the rooms, so she invite me inside until she was done. She was wearing a black skirt, thigh highs, black stilettos and a white button down blouse. I was sitting on the desk right in front of the chair she was using. She was writing something and then i couldn't take it anymore. I approach her slowly, she stop her work and look at me, she could tell what I had on my mind. In a second she stood up and then sit down on the main table. I met her there, and our lips were feeling each other in no time.

My hands started to run down her side, getting down to her legs, I placed my legs between hers and in an instant I felt my cock getting as hard as a rock. My hands found the bottom of her skirt and slowly i pull it up. I went crazy when my fingers jumped from the silk to her skin, I'm the biggest fan of thight hights stockings!!!!

We knew that we didn't have much time and that at any moment a security guy could show up. Even though I loved to sucked her pussy dry, we had to go straight to business. I pulled my pants down and sat on the chair, she removed her thong and got on top right away. She was so wet that it didn't take any effort for me to get inside her. she started to move up and down so I was able to feel her all the way. One of my hands grab her ass to help her move, the other one pulled her hair so her face was facing up, my lips went straight for her neck, kissing, sucking, biting with each movement. I wanted to feel her more, I wanted to make her mine!. I let her hair go and that hand opened her blouse, exposing her beautiful breasts. My tongue started to move around them, then my lips started to kiss them.

The adrenaline was running like crazy and in a matter of seconds I could her her moaning softly, her pussy contracting faster and faster, until she could not take it anymore, she put her mouth next to my right ear and started moaning, she knew I wasn't able to resist that and in the next thrust I came as hard as I could.

We stayed like that for a few minutes, I was still inside her just holding her and listening to each other's heavy breathing. At some point reality hit and we got dressed.

We never foud out if there were security cameras around, but if they were I'm sure we gave them a hell of a show!

I hope I didn't suck as much as I think I did writing this, but I never checked what I was writing. I wrote it as it came into my mind. There are some thing that you don't forget, and that night will stay for me forever.

2006-11-17T13:43:00.000-08:00

PS3

If you pay $9,000 for a PlayStation 3 you deserve to die. You have too much money and too little brains!

If you shoot somebody because of a PS3, you need to go to jail, you cannot live with the rest of society!

If you camped outside of Best Buy for a week to get a PS3, you deserve one, but you also deserve to stay away from everybody else, show that commitment for something better!

I like videogames, but this is just out of control.

Amen.

2006-11-17T11:27:00.000-08:00

This side of the fence

As far as I know nobody has ever cheated on me. Even if they did, they did such a great job that i never found out. Honestly I'm not sure if I would care, I guess that my ego would suffer some bruises but I don’t think it would be something that would devastated my life. I saw this movie a few years ago called "Denial". It followed up the lives of 2 couples. There was this guy who wanted to be faithful to his wife, but he had a friend that was a total male-whore (he was married as well), plus the first guy's wife and the man-whore wife. I'm totally fucking up the movie (so you better watch it if you get a chance) but this is the basic premise: They all were at a dinner party when this guy joined them. He was a writer and started to talk about his book, according to him people cannot be faithful, we all live on a state of denial regarding the ability to separate sex and love; we refuse to satisfy our needs because of what society decided is the right way to live (having sex with the same person until death takes you away). The wife of the male-whore was totally outraged by that comment and then it all started. By the end of the movie the following took place:
Simple guy who wanted to be faithful went to a massage parlor and felt so guilty that he got a happy ending that he told his wife, she totally flipped out and I think she kicked him out
The same girl that I just mentioned above had an affair with her college professor, this was before her husband told him about the happy ending
Man-whore had an affair with a sales clerk. He met her when he was shopping for a present for his wife, the sales clerk knew he was married and still fucked him. On a later scene she is desperately crying because he didn’t call her.
Man-whore's wife slept with the author that they met at the dinner party at the beginning of the movie
There's way more than this, but I cannot remember all the details. The second couple (man-whore and wife) had this rule: “don’t ask, don’t tell”. By the end of the movie they stayed together, he prepared this awesome party just for the 2 of them on their balcony. Couple #1 split, even though she fucked somebody that she liked and he only got a hand-job from an old Asian woman, he was the one to blame because he confessed. I honestly think that everybody should work on a “don’t ask don’t tell” mode. They were in love! Yes, they fucked other people but that was just sex, and they were both aware of the situation. Am I insane for even assuming that something like this is possible and that it could work? Probably. What was my point? None I guess, but Cyris blog really made me think.

Too much thinking, it is Friday afternoon, it is sunny and I have a gazillion conference calls. I think there should be a law that prohibits the set up of conference calls or meetings on Friday afternoon…unless there’s alcohol involved. I’m working on this office-sex post (blame Bri), we’ll see if I can finish it, maybe she can take some pointers from here!

2006-11-14T19:28:00.000-08:00

Home
Hard to know what it is
If you never had one
Home
I can't say where it is
But I know
I'm going
Home
That's where the hurt is
And I know it aches
And your heart it breaks
You can only take so much
Walk onLeave it behind
You've got to leave it behind
All that you fashion
All that you make
All that you build
All that you break
All that you measure
All that you steal
All this you can leave behind
All that you reason
All that you care
It's only time
And I'll never fill up all my mind
All that you sense
All that you speak
All you dress up
And all that you scheme
All you create
All that you wreck
All that you hate

Walk On (U2)

I love U2, I saw them live last year and I can say that it was more than a concert, it was a true experience! Yes, their music is awesome, but the vibe and what they represent is so much bigger than a just a rock band (let's forget that they do make millions of dollars, hey at the end they deserve it).

Anyway, I just had to add the concert part because it was that awesome, and if you have the chance to see them live, you better take it!

That song, Walk On, is one of my favorites. I decided to post it after reading somebody's blog. She is new to this city (been there!) and I know how difficult it can be. Changes in general are difficult, but I think a change of city has to be by far one of the most stressful/depressing situations a person can face.

It's not easy been alone, specially when you come from a place where you had friends and in general, a life! I left behind a great group of friends, guys that I met when I was in second grade and that stayed with me through good and bad times. They were there when I took the plane to NYC, and they have been there every time that I went back to visit. When I first came here, I had nobody, and that was the biggest shock. The size of the city, the subway, the "rudeness"

the new yorkers, all of that wasn't a shock. Finding myself with nobody to call for a drink or to go out to a movie was my biggest issue. I found myself going to dinner and movies alone, drinking alone. It was tough, i was on my mid 20's and I found myself trying to meet new people, I was out of my safe zone and it wasn't easy.

I guess at some point I had to leave it all behind and start all over and I pushed myself to give this place a chance. Life's all about choices. I think this city deserves one.

2006-11-13T17:06:00.000-08:00

1 Dirty Martini (3 olives, extra dirty)
1 Long Island Iced Tea
The best Mexican food ever
1 more LI Iced Tea for the road
1 Vodka on the rocks
Make it 2 (one for the road)
1 Jack and Coke
One more for the road

It's been years since I felt this sick. It is Monday night and I'm still feeling hanged over. Am I that damn old?? It is funny how little differences in your life make you remember your age. I can say that I was a party guy. I started drinking very early, which deserves a longer explanation: for whatever reason the school system thought that I was smart and decided to make me skip one grade, so I always was the youngest on my grade. When my friends were 14, I was 14, so yes, by age 14 I was drinking and smoking. We started to drink cheap wine, one bottle for the six of us, then it was a bottle for 3, then for 2, then a bottle for each one. We moved to harder liquor and I can say that by age 15 I mastered the skills of drinking. I was able to drink and hold my liquor.

When I got into college, when most of my classmates were experiencing the wild life for the first time I was getting kind of tired of it. I started dating THE ex. The party stopped and the drinking was greatly reduced. Whenever we got together with my friends we were amazed of how little we drank and how we learned to stop... we reached the point where we didn't have to finish all the alcohol available just because it was there.

When before we were able to drink for the entire weekend, literally non-stop, now we could hardly open our eyes the next morning.

I'm 30 and I have never feel as bad as I did this last Sunday. I will not into details here, but it was bad! I don't remember the last time that I spent a whole day on my pajamas!

At the end of the day, when I was finally ready to put some food on my stomach, I could only think about the moment of my life that I'm enjoying right now. Yes, I'm not partying/drinking/fucking like a rock star anymore, but the things that I enjoy today are definately not making me feel like i'm dying the next morning.

Let me take that last one back, I can still fuck like a rock star!

2006-11-10T11:27:00.000-08:00

Could it be possible?

Is he really back?

hmmm

2005-09-23T13:55:00.000-07:00

Things change, that's a fact. But why? Why the hell passion has to die? why do we have to give up? Is it just human nature? I cannot deal with that! it is just not me. Everything I do I try to do it with passion. I work my ass off because I love my job, and I love it because it gives me the chance to do something with all my passion going beyond the limit. I'm kind of a fantic of The Apprentice", one of my friends just hates the show, he says he cannot stand all those "overachievers". Dude! I'm one of them, I honestly don't think I'm like this because I want power or money (but who doesn't want a little more of both), but because it keeps me alive. Of course it is not the only thing that keeps me alive! it is not the reason why I wake up every morning, but if I spend 9 or 10 hours here I might as well enjoy it and try to have a good environment for the people that work for/around me.

I do have tha passion in relationships (and sex of course!). But the big difference is that a relationship involves two people and one person's passion might not be enough to keep things alive. At the end that person is going to feel cheated and exhausted, and negativity might take over. Is there a soultion? Earlier today I wrote to somebody that communication is the key. Later on I was wondering if communication could help even if the other person doesn't change. I'm afraid the answer is not, which just sucks!

I know people are going to hate this, but this is the reason why people have affairs. it might sound like a lame ass excuse, but just like I love my job, I enjoy sex! and I want to feel that passion. Is cheating acceptable? I would say yes, if the boundaries are clear. I read a couple of blogs about it and apparently things can work out if you enter into it with an adult mind and with a clear idea of what you want.

Me? I want passion!

"John Milton: Freedom, baby... is never having to say you're sorry. " From The Devil's Advocate

2005-09-12T12:26:00.000-07:00

We all know what happened the first six days. Now we all are living the eternal seventh day.. that day where God was too tired and decided to retire and relax. That's where we came and started to enjoy life.

THis is my second blog, the first one was eliminated in a moment of rage and desperation. Do I regret it? Just a lil' bit. It was fun while it lasted but it became a major source of pain. It's gone and now it is time to start all over again. I was going to write about me here, but I guess it makes more sense to update my profile. Here I can explain the new username (and no, I won't tell you the old one, that my friends will be my secret!). El Cuervo means The Raven (probably you knew that or you could find out about it). Yes, it has something to do with Poe's poem, but also because the poor bird has a very bad reputation regardless of its innocence. Unlike me, who has a very good reputation regardless of my so no innocent life. I'm not evil, I'm just human.

I enjoy the good things in life, I enjoy my job and most of my life. But of course there are things that fuck with my happiness. I'm not really into the whole cahin and tag stuff, but I think it is just fair to write once and for all my 101 things (after all I want to share more of this life with some fellow bloggers out there). So hang on tight and here we go!:

1.- I'm 29, but I can still drink like a 21 year old
2.- I was born outside the US, just came to the states 6 years ago
3.- I love this country, specially what it stands for, but it worries me that the religious right is killing that freedom that built and made this country as strong as it is
4.- I do love my country, I didn;t leave to find a better life, I had a good life, I just came to study and explore the world
5.- I stayed because I fell in love
6.- I was wrong, I wasn't in love but I don't regret staying in the US
7.- I LOVE my job, and I kick ass at it!
8.- Yes, I might appear as cocky but I don't see anything wrong on taking credit for what I do
9.- I have very few good friends, but I know lots of people
10.- I've been in love twice
11.- The first woman I truly loved followed me to America, I didn't ask her to do it.
12.- She's married now. We chat often but I haven't seen her in almost 3 years
13.- She's in the top 3 best sex ever... adn we did it for 4 years
14.- I think there's a difference between having sex, fucking and making love
15.- Although making love is better, very few things beat a good fucking!
16.- I love music. My Ipod is the most extreme melting pot ever! From Metallica to Sinatra, from Bob Marley to Pearl Jam, from the Doors to latin music
17.- I LOVE NYC, and honestly think that everybody should experience this city at least once in the lives
18.- I cannot understand how people from other regions can be afraid to come to NYC.
19.- I don't understand either how Ioha can get the same amount of money to protect themsleves from terrorism as NYC (no offense to Ioha)
20.- I consider myself a Democrat, but would vote for Rudy in a second
21.- I would NEVER vot for Arnold... California, what the hell where you thinking????
22.- I agree a little bit with Kanye... but I would change the phrase to W doesn't care about poor people regardless of the color
23.- I'm blessed I'm well above the poverty line
24.- I still need more money!!!!
25.- I like to live the good life, I work hard, I play hard
26.- I couldn't be a vegetarian even if I tried, I LOVE meat too much
27.- but I cannot stand fish
28.- I like to drink, although I cannot drink as much as I used to (Scotch, I love Scotch!)
29.- I party like crazy in college, and I don't regret a single thing
30.- I only party like that a couple nights a year, and it's plenty
31.- Although I don't think I have a thing for feet, I can be easily turn off by a woman with ugly toes
32.- It might have something to do with the teaching from an exlover. She told me that if a woman takes care of something as insignificant as her toe nails, then the chances are that she takes good care of everything else
33.- The above statement usually is true
34.- The second person I've been in love told me "I Love you" after i sucked her toes
35.- it was our second date and we were having sex
36.- I love boobs! all sizes and shapes
37.- I lost my virginity at 15
38.- It was a good experience and it bothers me that not everybody can say the same thing, the first time should be special and should be remembered in a positive way
39.- I only had sex with one virgin, although I had the chance 3 other times. I didn't want to be an asshole the other 3 times. The only time I did it was a good thing... she has good memories
40.- I had sex with more than 20 women, which I don't think makes me a male-whore
41.- Somebody thinks it does. She asked me one day, I was stupid enough to tel her the real number... she cried for days,a nd I still get shit for it
42.- I was only her second guy. She only did it once with the first guy
43.- I have 2 Bachelor degrees
44.- I didn't party when I was getting the second one, I pay for it and I got a 3.9 GPA
45.- In October I will see U2 live at the MSG. That will pretty much complete the list of bands I wanted to see live.
46.- I think I'm adding McCartney
47.- I saw GN'R twice. The old band was so much better.
48.- I thought about sucide back in my late teens
49.- I'm glad I didn't...
50.- I have a thing for older women (nothing extreme!)
51.- I think they are smart and extremely sexy
52.- The biggest age difference was when I was 21, she was 37
53.- I dated younger women... Although it wasn't bad, the results were more negative than positive
54.- I'm a sucker for lingerie
55.- I like the Jets...not the Giants
56.- I don't care about baseball that much. I went to a game in Shea stadium and will plan a visit to Yankees Satdium next year
57.- I've been unfaithful. I'm not really good at the hole monogamy thing.
58.- I think is possible to just have sex without involving feelings
59.- I owe a little too much on my credit cards
60.- My love for gadgets must have something to do with it
61.- I had an MP3 player wayyyyyyyy before the Ipod was even out
62.- I download music from Napster and I didnt feel bad at all
63.- I stop downloading free stuff because of spyware and viruses, not because of my guilt
64.- Hurting people makes me feel guilty
65.- I tend to do it more often than I would like
66.- Both women that I've been in love called me "Mr. Perfect" when they get mad
67.- I do think I'm pretty close to perfect...
68.- if you read the other 67 you can tell i'm not perfect
69.- Love it! Love it! Love it! (I hope you get this one)
70.- I was raise catholic. I even went to cahtolic school my whole life (including college)
71.- I like the idea of catholicism, i hate the Church as an institution... Life's too unfair and they don't seem to care (plus the whole sex scandal!!!)
72.- I want my son to be catholic, less the guilt and the obligation of going to church
73.- Jesus was an awesome human being... he would be a new yorker if he came back
74.- My parents still live together in a happy marriage
75.- I don't think I'm going to have a marriage like that
76.- I don't have good feelings for my older brother, I think he's a manipulative, irresponsible, immature 33 year old
77.- I don't want anything bad to happen to him, but he needs something that shakes his life for good
78.- I love my sister... but she's also immature as hell
79.- She can be daddy's little girl only when she wants something
80.- yes, I'm a middle child, but I'm the only normal one
81.- I skipped one year on elementary school, so all my friends are older than me
82.- That explained why I was drinking and smoking when I was 13
83.- I quit smoking at 17
84.- I only smoke when I drinka lot
85.- Sometimes I still smoke other things
86.- I don't do any other drugs anymore
87.- i think pot should be legal
88.- and other legal drugs should be banned
89.- As Chris Rock said, I'm liberal for some issues, and conservative for others
90.- I paid for sex... it wasn't my money and it was TJ
91.- I love strip clubs! but I would never go by myself
92.- I had a 3some once
93.- It was great, but definately not as great as the fantasy every man has
94.- Like Frankie said, I did it my way (most of the time)
95.- I read periodically a lot of blogs
96.- I'm an ungrateful ass who doesn't comment on those blogs
97.- That is going to change
98.- I will update this blog often
99.- and will add pictures
100.- I consider myself a happy person
101.- I love quotes (movies, music, people), so u might see lots of them around!

"Tyler Durden: This is your life and it's ending one minute at a time."